I’m forty errr, I´m forty-one… that´s it… no come back… Thirties are totally, completely, over… Last year was my “landmark birthday”, the number 40 (and every single one of its partners!) carries some weight with it. But in a good way. When I was a teenager, I used to think that by the age of 30 I’d have conquered the world, traveling all over, hauling my perfect and obedient kids with my not-less-than-perfect husband.
Well… at 30 I´d discovered the world was much bigger than my ‘embellished‘ reality…
… And I’m still working on conquering my world, not solely by myself, and not as easily as I’d initially fantasized…
Secretly, I was looking forward to my 40´s – the idea gives me a sense of pride, of accomplishment, of the ability to overcome challenges.
It does make me really proud to tell people who ask about my age – “I’m forty one”… (also I’ve a confession: it’s the best when some kind soul responds saying: “really? you don’t look like“… it just makes my day! Don’t care if there’s an excess of kindness about the comment – I’d take it face value, why argue?!) ♥ Accept the compliments gracefully… and gratefully!
These 4 decades have taught me a great deal.
I’ve learnt that I can’t know everything, control everything and decide alone about everything (don’t let my husband know that!). I need to listen more than I talk. I need to be more understanding and more patient with little things (now tell me how, if exactly when you’re trying to get out of the house, your middle child spills her morning juice all over your new tablecloth, your clothes, and maybe, on your hair?) I’ve also learnt that no matter how expensive your anti-wrinke creams are, they may not work the way your expected… and may not disguise those distinct motherly dark circles under your eyes, a proud label saying: “I’m a mom and I’m tired”. But I’m not always tired. Just often. Pretty much everyday… But I know there’ll be an end to the tiredness: when my kids grow up (??), and begin living their own lives (this is also part of my ‘embellished reality‘ – gotta hold on to something!!)
Age has taught me a few tricks for life:
(1) a good bra may work wonders, but it may hurt you, too. If the improvement on your posture and silhouette is worth the pain, go for it. Not for me. I’d likely pass.
(2) I got my sagging eyelids from my mom. She’d (plastic) surgery when she was 33, and I haven’t (yet?). That said, I already owned the right to ‘blame’ her genes… “you know, it comes from my mother’s family“…
(3) If you think some piece of clothing (or shoes) may not look good, don’t even consider trying it on, and/or buying… Just because something looks good on your laptop screen or on a catalog, it doesn’t mean it’d look good on a real 3D you! I’m sure those (super) models are starving, and would give anything for a 1/3 pounder burger!!! ♥
(4) My backpacking days are way over. Got hand it to a good comfy room, unlabeled sheets, with AC, wi-fi, and if possible, with a bathroom, separated from my kids‘…
I’ve learnt to enjoy some “me”, and cherish it. Especially if ‘my company is being flavored’ with some wine… I’ve learnt to appreciate the quietness, but also, to survive the hectic and noisy madness that is my household. I’ve learnt to be my own person, and I’m content with it. I’m happy to be part of the 40s since last year – lots of planning to do for the this decade. Included among the plans, lots of love and laughs…
Related articles
- 23 things I have learnt in 23 years (fallingfalcon.wordpress.com)
- 10 Things My Mom Taught Me (anirenicon.com)
- Recognition (vinaychaganti.org)
- 11 Things I’ve Learnt About Being a Working Mum Again (tatumwoodroffe.typepad.com)








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Rob Viens
June 25, 2012 at 2:23 pm
Happy Birthday – 40′s are great (aside from a few extra aches and pains)! And good luck on your coming move.
3rdCultureChildren
June 25, 2012 at 3:22 pm
Thank you very much, Rob! Still owing you that blogpost… will have to work on that… soon! :
Thanks for stopping by!
Spiritual World Traveler
June 21, 2012 at 12:19 pm
Happy belated birthday! I’m 40, turning 41 in August and loved this!
3rdCultureChildren
June 21, 2012 at 1:23 pm
Thank you very much! Hope it was, at least… “inspiring”… ;o
Spiritual World Traveler
June 21, 2012 at 2:05 pm
It was!
3rdCultureChildren
August 24, 2012 at 8:35 pm
Ines Crockett
June 20, 2012 at 9:28 am
Welcome to the CLUB !!! Feliz Cumpleanos !!! Muchos besos
The Guat
June 20, 2012 at 4:07 am
Awesome post. I love the humor and honesty.
I love the anti-wrinkle cream bit especially “… may not disguise those distinct motherly dark circles under your eyes, a proud label saying: “I’m a mom and I’m tired””
Good one.
3rdCultureChildren
June 20, 2012 at 4:33 pm
thank you. I really tried to kep it real, honest… It’s not easy to be a wife, mom, partner, friend… So, why people are so hard on themselves?,
just be rea! Real women have curves, wrinkles, trouble with their bras…
you’re right.. Being proud of being a mom, and tired!
aren’t we all? Thank you for stopping by and commenting! Much appreciated…
Janet Eckman
June 19, 2012 at 10:26 am
You really don’t even look 40! You’re just beuaitful inside and out.
Janet
Sasha Nel
June 19, 2012 at 7:56 am
Happy birthday Raquel! We miss you guys!
Mitzie Mee
June 19, 2012 at 5:54 am
Happy birthday! If I look like you when I’m forty (which I probably won’t since I’m Asian:)) I’d be very happy.
3rdCultureChildren
June 19, 2012 at 10:25 am
Ohhh, Mitzie!
)
You’re just funny…
Thanks for the wishes!
Gilly Gee
June 19, 2012 at 3:05 am
Happy Birthday! Nature has indeed been kind to you because you look fab
Have a wonderful birthday, week and month!
3rdCultureChildren
June 19, 2012 at 4:13 am
Thank you very much, Gilly!